A year of thanks

It’s hard to believe another Thanksgiving is already here. I was recently thinking about our family celebration last year and how wonderful it was. Jeff’s parents had just returned from their service in Guatemala and we were so excited to finally have grandparents close by! I made a video of our last Thanksgiving but never shared it here.

I watched it again today and it stirred so much emotion in me. Gratitude is such a powerful tool for good. As we exercise it, it gives us power to change. Gratitude truly does change everything.

Thanksgiving 2012 from c mask on Vimeo.

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This wild road

I saw one of my dear friends a few nights ago and in our catching up, she reminded me about the days I used to blog. I smiled. I loved to be the storyteller of our life…sharing the funny, quirky, and important moments that I unlocked from my mind and crafted into words. I love looking back and remembering the time I was wrangling a toddler in a doctor's office while naked (ahem) or the stranger on the internet who changed our lives. Those were good times and hard times and beautiful times.

Life is still good, hard, and beautiful. Yet, it is a little different now. My youngest is four. Four lovely years old. And it's hard to fathom that toddlerhood is almost no longer part of my life. It has been for so long. Diapers, tantrums, locked doors to prevent mischief, middle of the night cries…it's almost gone. But a whole new world is opening up that I love. Having mature conversations, laughing at funny jokes, seeing their unique personalities blossom, I relish this time when they are looking to me for guidance but slowly becoming their own kind of wonderful. It's a privilige to be watching it unfold before my eyes.

I look forward to seeing what this next stage of life will bring. Motherhood truly is my greatest work. I feel the weight of responsibity yet I also feel the joy of becoming. Watching my children become and I become right along with them. We are shaping each other as we travel this wild road together.

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Our Guatemalan adventure {part 2}

This was the part of the trip we had been anxiously awaiting. When we spoke with Jeff's parents about wanting to do some type of service, they contacted a friend in Guatemala who helped us make this possible. We were told about a school in a rural town that could use our help. The trick was figuring out what we could bring for 250 children that would fit in our suitcases! We decided to fill a small bag for each child with school supplies and a small treat. 

The night before we went to the school, we made an assembly line and filled each bag with the goodies. It was so great to get the kids involved and talk about serving and giving.

The next morning we bumped and bounced along a dirt road back into a remote little town nestled in the densely green hills. Farms, animals and little cement homes dotted the landscape. We saw people heading off to work while a few little ones played on the side of the road.

We pulled off the side of the dirt road and saw a school at the top of a small hill. Music was playing in the distance as we carried our boxes and suitcases to the school. As we walked into the courtyard of the school, my eyes welled up with tears. I had no idea what to expect but I certainly wasn't expecting what I saw before me. The courtyard was full of children lined up around the walls and an area had been set up for us to sit. Above the chairs was a large curtain saying "Bienvenidos" or Welcome. Music was playing and they cheered and clapped as we walked in. I could barely hold in my emotions. We thought we were just going to come in and hand out the bags but we had no idea they were preparing a program to welcome and thank us. Looking at them all standing before me, I wished I could have brought so much more to give them. And then I panicked. We only had 250 bags but it seemed like 500 children were there. My heart pounded with a hope and a prayer that somehow we would have enough.

We sat down and they proceeded to welcome with words, songs, and a dance. A small group of children performed a customary dance and then another group of young girls showed us some of the traditional work of Guatemalan women. They washed clothing, cared for a baby, made tortillas, and wove fabric. What a special thing it was to watch them celebrate these simple acts of work that are important to them. And how important they are! I wanted to hug each one of those darling little girls and tell them never to be ashamed to have your work be that of a mother.

After the program was over, it was time to hand out the bags. As they lined up, it seemed like they were multiplying in numbers. I think we all kept praying that we would have enough for each one. We really wanted our children to be the ones to give them out, so we stood back and just keep filling up their boxes. Prayers were indeed answered because it seemed like the bags were manna from heaven. What a miracle! We had enough for all. Even a few teachers came up and quitely asked if there was enough for them too. It was humbling.

I had such a feeling of joy as I watched their faces. So happy. So grateful. And most of all, excited to receive something of their very own. As they opened the bag, a smile spread across their face and the first thing to come out was a Tootsie pop. No doubt, that was the favorite thing of all.

After all that was done, an older group of boys wanted to play a quick game of soccer. And how could Jeff say no? The 19 year-old Argentine in him came out and they had a great time! Of course, they smoked us but that was to be expected.

Then it was time to go home. It was one of those moments when you wish you could just stay forever but after many smiles and hugs we said goodbye with so much gratitude in our hearts. Not for what we had given them but for what they had given us.

I think her smile says it all.

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Our Guatemalan adventure {part 1}

It was no small undertaking to carry out a trip to Guatemala with our not so little family of six. I think the planning and preparing probably took me months in advance…mostly for the airplane ride (and boy, was I freaked out about taking all of my young children on an airplane!). But I'm so SO glad we did it!

Jeff's parents have been living out of the country for the past 15 years and they happened to be in Guatemala for the last three of those years. With it almost being time for them to return home for good, we figured this was our last chance to take advantage of a free hotel and awesome tour guides. 🙂

And what an adventure it was. In planning it, Jeff and I had hopes that we could give our children an opportunity to feel gratitude and to serve. Sure we would have a fun vacation, but we also wanted this to be an experience that would open their eyes and help them to see life beyond our little world. I can't say that the little boys will always remember this. But I hope that maybe through pictures, they will remember the feelings we shared together as a family. 

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Our first stop was Granny and Grandpa's home in Guatemala City. It was such a treat watching their eyes light up to see us and listening to their stories of serving the people in this country they love. The day after we arrived they whisked us off to an amazing waterpark. The waterslides were surely larger and scarier than any we've ever seen! Best part was that there were hardly any lifeguards on duty, only signs saying "Parents watch your children." The next day we headed to the most breathtakingly beautiful place in Lake Atitlan. We stayed in a home tucked away in a green hillside with views of the lake and volcanoes in the distance. The home was spectacular. We all wandered around exploring it with childlike excitement, finding beauty around each corner.

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Blossoms at Eight

She's eight.

It's hard to believe last month came and went in a flash. It was packed full of preparations for her special day. This being one of them. An orchard full of blossoms and two little girls dressed in white. Heavenly indeed.

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Easter 2013

Easter came quickly this year! Almost too quick for my liking but we enjoyed what we could. Poor Lincoln, he was sick and barely felt good enough to pick up a few eggs at the easter egg hunt. Then he just sat on the blanket until it was over. The good thing was he had no desire to over indulge in candy. I didn't mind one bit.

Sunday was much of the same. Still some sickness but we enjoyed time with family and reflecting on our Savior. A good Easter it was!

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Let me love you

Now, more than ever, I'm feeling the speed at which my children are changing. There was a point when I wished of nothing more than for them to reach that age when they could do more for themselves, be more independent and not need me so much.

My how the tides have changed. Oh they still need me, of course. But it's that slipping through my fingers feeling that tugs at my heart.

And I just want to press my nose to theirs, look into those little eyes and say let me love you.

Let me love you as long as I can.

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This is life.

Hello, Life. How are you? I’m doing well. Sometimes really well and other times, you know, just sorta kinda well…

Just the other day I was thinking about you and how I go through these phases of this and phases of that but there is part of you that never changes. You are my life. Mine to choose. Mine to create. And mine to love.

And I do love you. But the sad thing is this, I’ve gotten away from recording the moments you’ve given me. I’ve thought I could remember the little joys and laughter you’ve brought me. But you know me better, I forget them. They are gone before I know it.

I’ve decided something. I don’t want to forget all that you’ve given me. Especially the good parts.

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